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| Does the approach of 30 mean that opportunity is slipping away? Certainly not. |
If you’re feeling the pressure of the 30 year deadline, you’re not alone. That looming date has long marked the whittling away of life’s options. Certainly in times past, this anxiety was justified. In 1900, the life expectancy of the average American was 48, making 30 a ripe old age.
But let’s put things into perspective. Today’s average life expectancy is nearly double what it was at the turn of the last century. Maybe it’s time to consider pushing the timetable back a little bit to give emerging adults an opportunity to savor this long and winding life.
It’s true that in 1960, 77 percent of American women and 65 percent of American men had reached the five milestones of adulthood marked by sociologists - completing school, leaving home, becoming financially independent, marrying and having a child. However, a lot has changed in the United States since then. We know much more than we did.
For one thing, we’ve learned a lot about the way that human brains develop as we age. Once upon a time, we were fairly certain that brains “aged out” in our teen years, but tests by neurologists in the 1990s showed that wasn’t the case. On the contrary, they indicated that the brain continues to change, refining its processes, becoming better and better at what it does, for much longer than we originally thought. The prefrontal part of the brain - that part of the brain that lets you consider your own thoughts, make decisions, and set goals - is still evolving in the mid-twenties, which might explain why you’re feeling ambivalent about your future if the big 3-0 is on your horizon.
Albert Einstein once said, “A person who has not made his great contribution to science before the age of 30 will never do so.” There’s no doubt about Einstein’s genius, but even he made mistakes. The average age of Nobel Laureates today is between 45 and 60, and the most inspired work of physicists happens in their forties.
What does this all mean for you? It means you have time. Your life expectancy is luxuriously long compared to your ancestors. You marvelous brain is still still evolving, stretching to reach its potential. The rush towards adulthood can become a more meaningful journey. The pressures to marry, choose a lifelong career, bear children, accomplish greatness - they can all wait a little longer for you.
If you're an emerging adult feeling the pressure of decisions that lie before you, it may be that you would benefit from counsel. As a therapist and life coach, I am available to listen and to offer an objective perspective as well as much needed support. Let's talk one-on-one about how my coaching and therapy practice can serve you. I can be reached at my Uptown New Orleans office at 504-481-8997.
Dr. Eileen Wynne, PhD