MANAGING LIFE TRANSITIONS: Why me? Why now?

"When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves." ~ Victor Frankel

Living is a process of adapting to change.  No one escapes this reality and everyone is vulnerable to the uncertainty change brings.

Many transitions we plan for ourselves.  But even changes that are positive and anticipated - going away to college, accepting a job promotion, marriage, purchasing a home, the birth of a child—can be diverted by surprises.  Unanticipated transitions can traumatize us—the death of a loved one, being downsized at work, serious illness, ending a relationship—events such as these may shake our foundations.

One objective of successful living is to resolve to adapt as best you can to whatever comes your way.  That spirit of resilience helps in restoring balance and serenity.  Learning to move through life's transitions, accepting setbacks and crisis, pursuing new opportunities in spite of adversity are ways we grow in wisdom.

Here are some coping skills to manage stress during a transitional event:

1. Resolve to adapt: Transition affects all life forms constantly.  When change impacts you, resolving to adapt helps you restore balance and live in harmony with the world around you.

2.  Express yourself.  Give yourself time to work through your feelings about the transitional event.  Grieve your losses, celebrate your joys and then focus on moving forward  with your life.

3. Don't panic. There is always time.  Take it.  Think.  Make plans. Explore  possibilities.   Share ideas and concerns with mentors.

4. Stay sober.  Alcohol and drugs  divert your focus, provide no solutions and prolong the discomfort.

5. Take care of yourself.  Stress can compromise your physical and mental states of wellness. Attention to diet, exercise, spiritual and mental health can help you restore yourself to balance.

Having a caring, competent professional to work with during a time of transition isn't a sign of weakness; it's a sign of taking caring of self. If you or someone you know is in need of support during a life transition, please call me to schedule an appointment. Let's talk one-on-one about how my coaching and therapy practice can serve you. I can be reached at my Uptown New Orleans office at 504-481-8997.

Dr. Eileen Wynne

PRACTICAL DREAMS: Are you facing failure or rejection? Look again. Perhaps it's actually opportunity you see.

"If one dream should break into a thousand pieces, never be afraid to pick up one of those pieces and start again".  ~ Flavia

Sometimes, a dream as you first envision it doesn't work out for you.  Don't give up.  Re-evaluate that dream.  Perhaps you can adapt pieces of it into something just as rewarding.  Adaptation is a creative process, not a symbol of failure.  I call adaptation practical dreaming.  A dream that didn't work as you envisioned it may prove to be your greatest success.  From one broken dream you may discover a thousand more to pursue.

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Here is a simple visualization to help you begin to reconstruct a dream.  Visualization techniques are most effective when you engage them daily.

Choose a quiet place.  Relax in a meditation position that is comfortable for you.  Close your eyes if you prefer.  

Begin to breathe - deeply, slowly, regularly.

Let yourself imagine....

Near you is a shimmering blanket of white light.  Reach out, feel its softness and warmth. Pull its protective layers around you.  Bury your face in its soft folds.  Inhale its warmth, lightness and comfort.  Inhale.  Feel the fibers moving into the farthest reaches of your being.  Exhale any dark clouds of discouragement, failure and self-doubt, any anger and negativity that distracts you from your purpose.

When you are relaxed and at peace with yourself, think about your original dream.  Imagine it breaking into pieces.

Select  one piece and set the rest aside for now.  Examine it carefully.  What attracted you to this segment?  Can you adapt it into a new beginning?  

What steps can you take today to build this practical dream? 

If you would like someone to help you construct or reconstruct the dreams you have for your life, contact me! My Life Coaching services can help you discover and live the dream life you desire! I currently have a limited number of spots available in my private therapy and coaching practice in Uptown New Orleans. You may call me to make an appointment at 504-481-8997.

Dr. Eileen Wynne